WE'RE ALL GOING TO DIE AND WE'RE DOOMED AND I JUST WANT TO GO LIVE UNDER MY BLANKET AND HOPE I GET VANISHED NICE AND QUICKLY AND WITHOUT ANY FUSS OH GOD ALL THAT WORK ALL THOSE YEARS FOR *NOTHING* WHYYYYYY.

... LOOK I CAN'T TALK ABOUT THIS ANYWHERE ELSE. My brother will get all disappointed. NOT THAT I CARE.