He's even cuter than me! ZOMG no fair!!!

[auroryborealis.livejournal.com]

So, I have the most adorable puppy. You may have met him. His name is Vladdie. And seriously, he is unfairly cute.

The problem is, he's so cute and such an attention whore that when I take him out for walkies, people always pay attention to him! And not me!

What do I do?

Comments

[chasingangela]

You could get Professor Dream to transform you into a puppy for a while.

[auroryborealis.livejournal.com]

I bet I would be a way cuter puppy than Vladdie, anyway.

But would that mean that Barbossa would start referring to me as Rory-who-used-t'be-a-puppy?

[chasingangela]

Hmmm. Maybe.

On the plus side, you and Logan would own any and all cutest couple contests for the forseeable future.

[auroryborealis.livejournal.com]

Bunny/Puppy OTP, yo.

[whitedeathpod.livejournal.com]

You let people rub your tummy, I bet they'll pay more attention to you...

[auroryborealis.livejournal.com]

I would so let people rub my tummy. I'm kind of fat, anyway, so it's all squishy.

[whitedeathpod.livejournal.com]

You are so not kind of fat. You are not fat at all.

I'm the pudgy one. And hmmm...could you set Vladdie up as fall guy for a scheme? Steal Anakin's phallic symbol light saber and blame Vladdie?

[auroryborealis.livejournal.com]

You're not fat. Seriously, have you seen the stuff I eat? I am on the path to obesity.

And as much as I would love to steal Anakin's lighty swordy thingy, I fear that Vladdie would probably want to play with it and would chew on it and make Anakin unhappy. And dude, he's emo enough as it is.

[msgilmoredanes.livejournal.com]

You are so *NOT* on the path to obesity!

Gilmores have excellent metabolisms.

[can_be_more]

You are not pudgy, what the hell. I will start beating you when you say that.

[whitedeathpod.livejournal.com]

Ouch. That would be bad. I'll try to refrain but when someone gives you the nickname Stump Chunkman, it's kind of hard!

[can_be_more]

They named your friends CRUNCH BUTTSTEAK and BIG MCLARGEHUGE. And you're listening to them?

[notstakedyet.livejournal.com]

I was going to suggest wearing a leash.

[auroryborealis.livejournal.com]

See, Vladdie on a leash? Adorable.

Rory on a leash? Kinky. But not adorable, and that's what our goal is, damn it.

[notstakedyet.livejournal.com]

Oh, it is? Sorry, I was stuck on the whole my own personal happiness gig.

[auroryborealis.livejournal.com]

Where would we even find a leash that would fit me, anyway?

It's impractical, regardless of how happy it would make you Logan the general public.

[notstakedyet.livejournal.com]

... I know places.

[auroryborealis.livejournal.com]

Why would you even want me on a leash? I don't get it!

So impractical.

[notstakedyet.livejournal.com]

I could keep you close that way.

For Bible study.

[auroryborealis.livejournal.com]

But if it's for Bible study, then the leash is unnecessary. I am a willing scholar of the Good Book, as everyone knows.

[notstakedyet.livejournal.com]

You couldn't pretend to be a little unwilling? Just to make me happy?

C'mon, how hard is it to fake like you're Episcopalian?

[auroryborealis.livejournal.com]

I don't fake it! Ever. You know that.

[notstakedyet.livejournal.com]

That's not what Cute Dean says

[auroryborealis.livejournal.com]

ZOMG a TWoP reference

And he's NotCuteDean anyway

[notstakedyet.livejournal.com]

So you don't deny the charges?

[auroryborealis.livejournal.com]

He's not cute. And he was married!

But he was all sad if I didn't act least act like it...so...

[12parseckessel.livejournal.com]

Rory on a leash would so be adorable.

At least, as long as it's a pretty one.

[lisacuddy.livejournal.com]

Spread a rumor he's actually a Mexican rat?

[auroryborealis.livejournal.com]

But then, ew, people would think I live with a rat.

Or else they'd want me to get rid of him, and I don't want that.

[ten-and-chips.livejournal.com]

Take Vladdie for walkies. Then later, go out for a walk your own self.

[auroryborealis.livejournal.com]

That's genius!

But then people would say, "Where's Vladdie?" and be all disappointed when they find out I've left him at home.

[ten-and-chips.livejournal.com]

Well, if they've seen you walking him before...then they'd have gotten the cooing out of their system.

[auroryborealis.livejournal.com]

No one ever has the cooing out of their system. That puppy has melted the hearts of pirates, Power Rangers, superheroes and vampires alike. It's insanity, I tell you.

[dr-jwilsonmd.livejournal.com]

Wear Vladdie's collar?

[auroryborealis.livejournal.com]

...that's not a bad idea. Kind of kinky, though.

[master-of-fear.livejournal.com]

ZOMG!Q! Wilkins is way cuter

[auroryborealis.livejournal.com]

BUT VLADDIE CAN BITE YOU AND MAKE YOU A VAMPIRE SO SHUT UP. Plus he can fly.

[valentine-tart.livejournal.com]

Pick him up and put him on your lap. That way if they want to pet him, they have to at least acknowledge you.

Alternatively use him to meet men. Wait. You have one.

Maybe you need some dogwalking help?

[bugofjustice.livejournal.com]

You wanted a vampire puppy because you thought it would be cute. It's all your fault that the attention has been drawn away from you.

[can_be_more]

See, you've already done, it, though: You've made it ALL ABOUT YOU. All is right with the world again.

Though Vladdie is really cute.