fandomtherapy | (no subject)

(no subject)

You heard it here first, folks.

Everything is Officially Rory Gilmore's fault.

Dinosaurs extinct? Rory's fault.

Dropped your books in the hallway? Rory's fault.

Even if you've never met her, she's guilty of causing your problems.

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Clearly it's your fault that we're having this disastrous botched attempt at a Thanksgiving dinner at ALL, because OMG YOU LEFT US TO FEND FOR OURSELVES.

I'm a TERRIBLE cook. You would have been worse off with me there!

But...I should have invited you to the diner with me and my parents and Lockheed and Logan.

*beams at being mentioned before Rory's boyfriend*

I WENT ALPHABETICALLY OMG.

/"Parents" starts with a "P."/

I know, I mean "people other than parents" went alphabetically!

/Suuuuure. That's what we'll tell Logan. Rory likes me bet-ter!/

Okay, we are going into some WEIRD territory, here. Because I do adore you Lockheed, really I do. But there are some things that I do with Logan that I simply cannot do with you.

So...no. Just...no.

/Not like that. I'm not into humans like that. But still, you like me better./ *beams*

Thank you. That's...gratifying to know.

And I like you both very much in entirely different ways.

/And my ways involve being a wee purple dragon. Who can beat being a wee purple dragon?

Other than your ~~annoying~~ cute little dog, that is./

Yeah, Vladdie is like, teh übercute. I think he might beat you, simply because he loves everyone no matter what, omg.

/Also, he's your pet. You have a bias. ~~I refuse to acknowledge the fact that he truly is teh übercute, zomg. Mentioning that would be undignified for a wee purple dragon.~~/

*so does not link to that scary scary drawing on Fonts of Wisdom*

/I assure you that I neither want to know, nor will I acknowledge that you ever said that much./

YOU DIDN'T INVITE BRIDGE EITHER. IF HE EXCEEDS HIS EMO QUOTA FOR THE YEAR IT WILL BE YOUR FAULT TOO.

I WOULD'VE IF ~~WE HAD WRAPPED THE THREAD UP LAST NIGHT~~ HE HAD MENTIONED IT!! I HEART BRIDGE AND YOU KNOW IT.

OMG YOU HEART BRIDGE? WHEN LOGAN FINDS OUT ABOUT THAT AND GETS ALL UPSET IT WILL BE YOUR FAULT TOO.

PLATONICALLY OMG PLATONICALLY. I HEART LOGAN AND HE KNOWS IT AND I TOLD HIM AND HE DIDN'T SAY IT BACK AND THAT'S MY FAULT TOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.

FINE THEN, BUT IT'S ALSO YOUR FAULT THAT BRIDGE WILL END UP BLUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUE.

OMG I'M SO, SO SORRY FOR THAT. BECAUSE, OMG, WORST. EVER.

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