(no subject)

[threeweapons.livejournal.com]

We know about the Daddy issues. What about the Mommy issues? They deserve love to. Especially the dead ones.

((ooc: No, I have no idea what my character and I are on.))

Comments

[mparkerceo.livejournal.com]

You think?

So what's the deal with the uncle? Does he send you presents, at least?

[ihatedenmark.livejournal.com]

Well, sometimes. She's still really hot for being a middle-aged woman.

No, not so much presents at spies and things to try & murder me with. We both want to kill each other but not do it openly. I think we're both going to send each other "Please die so that I can be the real King of Denmark" cards this year.

[mparkerceo.livejournal.com]

Okaaaaaay. We won't request "Stacy's Mom" at the Winter Dance, then.

Have you ever considered jobbing it out? I know there's guys who make a good living wage at that.

[ihatedenmark.livejournal.com]

Can we still have a movie night with 'The Graduate'?

If I did, my Father would just keep coming back to hassle me and haunt me everywhere I go. And my uncle would just keep trying to kill me no matter what I do, so I'll live longer if I try to kill him back. But not that long, because we both still die in Act V.

[mparkerceo.livejournal.com]

Of course. Anne Bancroft rules.

Ohh, one of *those* kind of dads. Have to push you into proving something. Never happy unless you're winning awards and killing people. You've got all my sympathy. Can you AU Shakespeare? And maybe you can be a ghost too!

[ihatedenmark.livejournal.com]

You have one too? He drives me mad. All that "Why haven't you killed your uncle yet, Hamlet?" and "Stop threatening your Mother with that dagger, Hamlet." and "Why are you hanging out with those actors when you could be doing something productive, Hamlet?". Ugh, he's dead, and he still forces me to do things. We'll have to see if my mun will let me live. I'd make a horrible King of Denmark, so she'll never actually let me get the crown, but she likes having me do things here, so she might let me survive.

[mparkerceo.livejournal.com]

I know! He's all, "someday, this will be yours" by which he means the corporate evil empire, but then he's like "if you keep your grades up" and "if you arrange a little garotting" and "only if you solve the New York Times crossword in under 15 minutes, young lady." It's crazy-making. And he never uses my real name! You wonder why I have a complex about it? Plus, I think he really wanted a boy. Heh. Oh, that would be fun.

[swerval_zero]

Does Hallmark make those?

[ihatedenmark.livejournal.com]

They do! You'd be surprised at the range of things they sell. They also have a line of "So you're a Venetian Moor who's been tricked into killing your wife by the guy you thought was your best friend -- Sorry to hear about it" cards with clever poems inside.

[swerval_zero]

I hear the "Dear secret husband, I'm not actually dead, so don't do anything dramatic like poison yourself over my corpse" line has been delayed until next year. Apparently they don't think there'll be much market.