fandomtherapy | (no subject)

(no subject)

So.

What's on your mind lately? Happy? Sad? Wanna air some grievances? Confess a crush? How are those minds of Fandom doing?

I'm not a therapist, I don't play one on tv but I have nice arms!

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Everyone thinks I'm gay for my friends!

You are, bub.

GO TALK TO YOUR SUMMERS. SEE IF EMMA'S DONE WITH HIM YET SO YOU CAN HAVE THE LEFTOVERS.

Canonically, I just go after Slim's girls. I even had a cover of Astonishing where I was making out with Frost. And I've never had any homoeroticism blatantly pointed out by my writers.

...Hey, let's talk about your kid again. That's a more fun topic.

You know what my having a psychotic son means?

It means that I got action from somebody who wasn't my best male friend.

That's because Scott's too hung up on Jean. Who you ALSO never had.

...

Ultimate doesn't count.

Fine. But I'm counting the movies, and she was completely into me there.

Meanwhile, Summers gets crapped on.

You mean you're not?

No, not everyone from Canada is gay.

Well, no, of course not. I never could get Walter to stop dating my sister and come screw me instead. *grumble grumble ~~why are Marvel twins better than a soap opera~~*

That's because Walter likes women. And science. One of those two.

So there are straight Canadians.

I just do not believe you are one of them.

Also, you married a man.

HEY LOOK! TONY STARK!

Weak.

*looks around for Tony*

It's always the ones who protest the loudest . . .

SHUT UP!

...even if your voice is like a female version of my own and therefore dulcet and sweet.

IT'S ALL IN THEIR HEADS.

I know! Exactly!

Don't acknowledge unsubstantiated rumors, Wade. It gives people worse ideas.

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