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Explain this holiday to me now, please. You know the one. The one with snow and trees and overweight men in bad suits with worse facial hair. I'm new! I don't know these things!

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All right, we're getting somewhere. What's a chipmunk?

Woodland rodent, cute, fuzzy, kinda chewy, taste a bit like chicken.

Why you'd be singing about one on the other hand...

So... There's bells, and snow, and eating woodland creatures while singing about it?

No, the creatures are singing. Kind of like in Snow White.

Okay. What's a Snow White?

And I know people turn into animals here, but they talk, too?

I think it's mostly just inside Fandom. Although, Alanna's cat talks, so I could be wrong.

Snow White is a fairy tale, about some princess in the woods who all the little animals loved, so they'd come and sing to her. She was kind of a dink.

The Chipmunks are a cartoon, and I think they're related to those forest animals. And they've been mainlining helium for forty years.

The animals definitely need better things to do. Maybe they could be somehow constructive to society instead of singing to dink princesses.

We eat cartoon animals on Cripsmass, then?

Sure, if we can catch them. Just not Rudolph. He's bringing the presents.

Rudolph brings presents? Is he the Santa Claus person?

He works for Santa. He's the lead reindeer. With a nose that glows in the dark.

Yeah, which is why I don't understand the whole fuss...

Okay, but what about the sheep? Do we have to eat sheep? Is that why people keep talking about them?

What is a sheep, anyway?

I think we have to sacrifice them or something. Don't know if we'll have to eat them, but they're tastier than chipmunk.

Sheep are big, wooly, animals that go baa.

Is there an animal you haven't eaten?

Uh, lemme think about that for a minute...

...

...

...maybe?

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