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Explain this holiday to me now, please. You know the one. The one with snow and trees and overweight men in bad suits with worse facial hair. I'm new! I don't know these things!

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What's the Jesus part?

The whole 'Christmas' idea comes from the birth of a guy named Jesus. He was either the child of God, or a prophet, or a nutjob, depending on your point of view. Was born in weird circumstances. See what Tara and Cally were saying.

Anyhow, he became the figure of the still dominant religion on Earth at this point in time.

Oh, okay. You all worship the baby.

Do you know how it fits into the cola salesman?

Well, the baby grew up and became this saviour type. So yeah, they all worship the baby, essentially. Me? Not so much. I'm not from around here.

As for the cola salesman, I think what Tara was trying to say is that the holiday has become extremely corporate, and that Santa is an emblem of that.

You, either, huh? How do you know all of this?

Oh, okay. So Santa Cola is a corporate pusher.

I like humans, even though I act like a jerkwad about them on occasion. I've spent a LOT of time on Earth throughout time.

And...er...these days, yeah.

((ooc: No, it's even worse than that. Santa Claus did not canonically wear red suits with white fur until Coca-Cola started drawing him that way in ads. Word.))

The baby is Jesus. Um, the savior, in the main religion in this part of the world. Christmas is supposedly his birthday, even though the shepards must have been freezing their asses off to be out at night at this time of year. So in theory, the holiday is about him, even though it's really mostly about buying stuff anymore.

And as for the whole big Jesus story ... um, is anybody here religious? Because I am so not, so I'm not going to try to explain him.

We buy stuff for a religious baby's birthday and give it to each other?

Yes. That. Exactly.

*realizes this makes no sense*

...oh, just sing a carol. It's fun! Really!

I don't know any! *flails!*

"Deck the halls with boughs of holly..."

Damn, now I'm going to have that stuck in my head for the rest of the day.

And the presents are because the Three Wiseguys showed up at his birth and gave gold, frankincense, and myrrh. So, tradition.

Okay, I can understand the gold ~~< /Vala >~~, but the other stuff?

Umm, I think they were spices. Used to wrap corpses.

Yeah, depressing gifts.

Maybe they were for the trade-in value?

They brought corpse accessories to a baby shower?!

It was a king thing. I don't get it either. Something about how they were the kind of thing everyone would need, and really, who wants stuff they need?

Still! You don't give a newborn death stuff. Even I know that!

I do wonder about those Wise Guys. Maybe it was a threat?

Repeat after me:

"Jingle bells, ~~Batman smells, Robin laid an-~~ whoops."

"Jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way, oh what fun it is to ride, in a one-horse open sleigh...."

Don't bother trying to understand the words and how the relate to the fat guy or the baby.

Well, the tune is stuck in my head...

Not for the baby. For each other. But other than that, yeah.

It's based on the fact that when Jesus was born, three wise men came to see him, bringing gifts of gold, frankensense and myhr.

Or at least that's what I've always understood.

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