(no subject)

[http://users.livejournal.com/_original_emo/]

Is my son a failure?

Case in point, this is a typical day for Lee Gideon Adama:

-Wakes up
-Takes a two hour shower using soap for soft skin and three different shampoos and conditioners.
-Eats toast.
-Styles hair with seven different haircare products.
-Eats toast.
-Admires his biceps and professes his love for said biceps.
-Eats toast.
-Writes poetry about his *gag* feelings.
-Eats English muffins.
-Buys butter.
-Flirts with John Crichton. Does this mean he's gay? I can't tell.
-Let's my sekkrit girlfriend Kara Thrace have her way with him.
-Eats toast with butter and jam.
-Goes to sleep with a teddy bear.

WHERE DID I GO WRONG?

Comments

[psycho-barbie.livejournal.com]

Now look what you've done!

Not my fault you produce emo in all who meet you!

[http://users.livejournal.com/_original_emo/]

Did you call her? I am not marrying her to be your stepfather no matter how much you want that to be!

It's a gift but I would've thought you would have been stronger. Cylon!Xena was wrong about you!

[psycho-barbie.livejournal.com]

You brought her up first! Not you're marrying her because you like to be a sekrit boyfriend pseudeo-daddy to strong, young, blonde women.

I am more than strong enough to withstand your emo-fu! It was suggesting Widow Twanky was my blood relative that did it!

[http://users.livejournal.com/_original_emo/]

You're onto me! That is not true though I do believe you need a strong male figure in your life. You need discipline for your insubordinate ways.

I bet hearing that will make Miss Twanky cry!

[psycho-barbie.livejournal.com]

Ha! I knew it. That's why I have Professor the Tick! They don't come much stronger. If I wanted discipline I'd ask Angelus to spank me.

Cry me a river, baby.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_original_emo/]

You love The Tick? That's...odd. How do you deal with the antennas?

Adama men (with the exception of Lee) do not cry! ()

[psycho-barbie.livejournal.com]

My love for The Tick is a pure and noble thing. Do not bring it down with your smutty innuendoes. You'd be surprised...

I could have sworn I saw tears as you fled Widow Twanky at Parent's Weekend.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_original_emo/]

Will be having Mr. Tick's children? Every alpha male needs a woman to continue the bloodline.

I HAD SOMETHING IN MY EYE!

[psycho-barbie.livejournal.com]

That is between The Tick and myself and possibly Professor Maclay.

Tears and the look of absolute terror!

[http://users.livejournal.com/_original_emo/]

If you have children, will you name one after me?

Well, look you'd just sang a song! My ears were in pain!

[psycho-barbie.livejournal.com]

I thought thats what my subtextual emo-crush Lee was for.

*goes to slap you across the face*

[http://users.livejournal.com/_original_emo/]

He is being a stubborn brat and refusing to do so. My bloodline needs to continue!

*catches hand with my omg so fast reflexes*

[psycho-barbie.livejournal.com]

But how can he live up to the Adama legacy as a teen father. Just give me some rope and an hour alone with him and you'll get your continued bloodline.

*uses my pout-fu on you*

[janet_fraiser]

Daddy Adama wants to spank Callisto?

Kinky.

[psycho-barbie.livejournal.com]

Well if you want to watch...

[janet_fraiser]

I'd watch Callisto spank almost anyone. Almost.