Four

[cameronmitchell.livejournal.com]

Four days. Four. Freaking. Days.

My player keeps wondering why I'm being this angsty (as if I don't have reason enough). It's really easy; I haven't gotten laid for FOUR FRAKKING FRELLING FUCKING DAYS.

I'm a teenager, damnit. Sex is always on my mind. My girlfriend isn't even on the same planet and spanking the monkey isn't quite cutting it now that I've been with Vala Mal Doran.

What? This is therapy. Can't I for once not be a boyscout and just come right out and admit that I haven't have sex in four days and it's FRUSTRATING.

Comments

[auroryborealis.livejournal.com]

No, no, Angela wanted to take me shopping for some sort of battery-operated device. At least, I assume so, since it was in the context of making me tremble on my own

I have no idea what she meant, though. Perhaps one of those handheld massagers? I can see how I would be all buzzy if I were like, leaning on it.

[notstakedyet.livejournal.com]

I feel fairly certain it was one of those hand-held massagers. I'm also certain I will regret missing out on that shopping trip.

[auroryborealis.livejournal.com]

No reason why you can't come with! We can make a group expedition of it!

[notstakedyet.livejournal.com]

I do so love field trips. We could say it was for a class project.

Is not currently thinking of Mac teaching a class in vibrator making, because that would not just be wrong but sick and wrong

[auroryborealis.livejournal.com]

We could. I bet one of the teachers would even sponsor us. I mean, we're just trying to lower our stress levels with massages, right?

That is very, very, very wrong. And I will so not be mentioning this to Mac's player. Because putting ideas like that in his head is Wrong.

[notstakedyet.livejournal.com]

Lowered stress levels make for excellent studying. I should know. I make sure to lower my stress levels with my fellow students once, twice, sometimes even eight times a day.

And we all know Mac's player so would not be interested in that sort of thing

[auroryborealis.livejournal.com]

You must have a lot of stamina stress, then! But how helpful of you, to help out your fellow students.

Oh no, never. He is very serious about this teaching thing, and not at all the sort of person who would actually plan that sort of lesson.

[notstakedyet.livejournal.com]

I do so love to help the helpless. I'm known for it, in fact. Acting helpless and pouting makes it even hotter... almost as hot as trying to kick my ass because that's fun too

Does not suggest attempting to get the Tick involved in this lesson somehow

[auroryborealis.livejournal.com]

I know! You're really a saint, Angelus, taking care of people this way. Do you have any stress-relieving techniques you could share? Pouting? I know no one who pouts here.

Good, because that would break my brain.

[notstakedyet.livejournal.com]

I have many techniques that I could share, though I'm better at hands-on demonstrations.

Say, Logan's not around. I'm sure he wouldn't mind if you helped me out with something like that. You know, for the good of our fellow students.

Mine too but now I can't stop thinking of it

[auroryborealis.livejournal.com]

Why would Logan mind? This is simply pure, innocent stress relief for the sake of the students! I mean, the boy has jealosy issues, but being angry with you over teaching me something so useful is really pushing it.

This is worse than when Becky was propositioning him.

[notstakedyet.livejournal.com]

Logan's a great and sharing guy like that. I'm absolutely certain he wouldn't mind the two of us teaching stress-relieving activities, regardless of whether or not any of our fellow students happened to be in the room with us at the time.

Dirty!

[auroryborealis.livejournal.com]

We could always videotape it, so that everyone could share in the stress relief, but it could be taught somewhere private so that neither of us would have performance anxiety. I mean, I for one get very nervous in front of crowds. You know that.

Yes. But so very, very, very funny.

[notstakedyet.livejournal.com]

That is true. You do get nervous in front of crowds. I remember that from the fashion show when I was watching your leather-clad ass you so closely while you were on stage. You know, to support you since Logan couldn't be there.

You're not wrong

[auroryborealis.livejournal.com]

That is so, so sweet. You're such a good friend to look out for me like that. Not only do you want to make sure my stress is alleviated, but you were concerned about my fear of crowds yesterday! Aw. So thoughtful.

And that interaction broke no one's brain either.

[notstakedyet.livejournal.com]

How could I be anything but a good friend? You were so kind to reach out and touch to me in spite of me being a vampire. That's the kind of thing that moves a guy in his pants. The least I can do is try to be the bestest guy buddy a girl like you could have.

And if helping you to relieve stress in a private and, appropriately enough, stress-free environment while Logan is not only out of town but hours away and with no way to find out about it is the only way that can happen... well that's just the kind of guy I am.

[auroryborealis.livejournal.com]

Hey, the very fact that Logan is away is stressful for me. So we can't help the fact that he isn't here and unable to participate in the stress relief, since he's technically one of the stressors in question.

And telling him about it would probably only make him upset that he wasn't here to help me out, and would make everyone more aggravated. It's a vicious cycle, really.

[notstakedyet.livejournal.com]

It so is. And Logan already has so much to worry about. It wouldn't be right for us to add to his burden by telling him about how you were stressed and he wasn't here to help with it.

[auroryborealis.livejournal.com]

Of course, Logan could probably use some stress relief as well.

[notstakedyet.livejournal.com]

Betcha Vladdie could help with that. That little pup's so gosh-darn cute you just can't be stressed when he's around.

[auroryborealis.livejournal.com]

This is true! And Vladdie does love his Uncle Logie.

[notstakedyet.livejournal.com]

I bet when Logan comes home Vladdie will be just dying to lick him all over.

[manofthemullet.livejournal.com]

If you check Sunday's Emporium thread, you won't see MacGyver buying all the batteries available. Nope. Not one bit. Does not invite you to watch Tuesday's class in the hopes that his students build something ZOMG DIRTY!

[auroryborealis.livejournal.com]

I BOTH LOVE YOU AND HATE YOU, FOR YOU HAVE KILLED ME DEAD.

[sharon-valerii.livejournal.com]

Especially if you make them naquadah-powered, so they'll last a life-time. He might as Sam Carter for pointers.