(no subject)

[rocksthescarf.livejournal.com]

So, let's talk about my favorite thing in the world: Sex.

Want more of it? Less of it? Who's not having it? Why aren't you having it? Would you like to have it with me?

And if you answer that last question with a "no", I'll know you're lying.

Alternatively for you prudes: How do you feel about bears and pie? Not mixed together. Or mixed together. I don't judge. My name's not Dan Humphrey.

Comments

[laidanegg.livejournal.com]

I just got out of a relationship with a girl who I only had sex with once, when I was stupid but hot and she was a junkie one weekend.

So I could go for some. Not with you, though. You're just not my type.

[rocksthescarf.livejournal.com]

You prefer wealthy orphans? Because if you wait a few months I can manage that.

[first-guardian.livejournal.com]

WHY ARE YOU PEOPLE ALL SO OBSESSED ABOUT THIS? WHY?

EVERYTHING WAS GOING JUST FINE AND NOW SOMEONE STUCK THEIR NOSE IN AND SHE WANTS TO HAVE DEFINITIONS AND CHARTS AND...

AAARGH!

[rocksthescarf.livejournal.com]

So...I take it you're not getting any?

[likes-chicken.livejournal.com]

Uhhh, dude, I haven't even had a second date yet.

[rocksthescarf.livejournal.com]

I don't see the need for a first date.

[suit-of-sables.livejournal.com]

...I miss Ellen.

And don't tempt me with the bears.

[gkar-lastkhari.livejournal.com]

You do have a roommate, do you not?

[gkar-lastkhari.livejournal.com]

I miss sex. Is it possible no one here likes spots?

[rocksthescarf.livejournal.com]

It's easy to confuse said spots with an STD of some sort.

[withoutverona]

I still have no complaints.

How have I been sleeping with the same girl for 10 months?

[rocksthescarf.livejournal.com]

10 months? Wow. And you're not bored?

[sonofmogh.livejournal.com]

Yes. Unfortunately humans tend to break easily.

[rocksthescarf.livejournal.com]

Wow. That rough, huh?

[multi-madrox.livejournal.com]

Me? I'm good. Thanks. Well more is always better but I'm quite frankly a-okay.

[rocksthescarf.livejournal.com]

If you had sex with one of your dupes would that count as some type of masturbation?

Just curious.

[talks2objects.livejournal.com]

THE ADULT CONSPIRACY PREVENTS ME FROM ANSWERING THIS QUESTION BECAUSE I HAVE NO IDEA HOW THIS WORKS!

Stupid canon.

[rocksthescarf.livejournal.com]

There's a few websites I can show you. It'll explain everything.

[clevermsbennet.livejournal.com]

I do not understand you people, and I begin to believe I never shall.

[rocksthescarf.livejournal.com]

It's fun! I think you should assimilate yourself to our culture and have hot sex with the lady who owns the flower shop.

[notyourpawn.livejournal.com]

Kissing was rather nice.

Is sex like that?

Everyone says that you shouldn't, but no one ever explains why.

[rocksthescarf.livejournal.com]

Sex is about a million times better than kissing. Don't listen to what everyone says. You should have as much sex as possible.

[not-a-mused.livejournal.com]

...

Sigh. Just...

...sigh.

[rocksthescarf.livejournal.com]

I'm sorry about your bits.

You can live vicariously through Charlie Trout's escapades on Rumor Gal.

[stocksgrrl.livejournal.com]

Fiiiiiiiinaaaaalllyyyyy~! *bouncebouncebounce*

[rocksthescarf.livejournal.com]

Yay! What took so long?

[all4thewookiees.livejournal.com]

No. Now stop asking about the sex lives of the elderly, dammit! Nobody wants to hear about whether we do it, how often, and with whom. Not even us!

[iguessiamaclone.livejournal.com]

Well, it's been a much weirder couple months for me than you could imagine, so I'm taking some time to work out some issues of my own before I make anyone else deal with them.

[justice-beat.livejournal.com]

Bless, more of it's never bad, though it's an...interesting change in pace to be getting it consistency from the same bloke...

...oh, and come talk to me in a couple of years.

[perfectmissyork.livejournal.com]

Monogamous sex! It's the best sex there is and really the only kind of sex any woman ever really wants, deep down in their heart of hearts!

[the_merriest]

I'm taaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaken, and even besides that, I really think I'm not interested in you. Sorry? You might make faces at me if I bit too hard.

[thatsamilkshake]

I have low self-esteem and large breasts. YOU WOULD THINK IT WOULD BE EASIER.

[inthereflexes.livejournal.com]

...

[scary-jeff.livejournal.com]

HALELUJAH!

[ashockingbitch]

If I don't get some soon I am going to scream.

You?

[gobrookeyourself]

Why AM I not having it??? Seriously, what the hell.

[solo_sword]

I'm completely good here, thanks!

And no, I wouldn't want to have sex with you. The AU us was enough.

[iruinenglish.livejournal.com]

There was an Incident.

I think I'm just gonna hold out for college, when that sort of thing is maybe slightly less scarring.