fandomtherapy

I'll start.
I hate myself. I hate myself ~~and did I mention that my girlfriend was making out with an Immortal? yeah, that stings~~. I hate myself. And it's not like suicide would work either. In fact, it would probably just make things worse.

Bloody regeneration shite. [kicks the floor, hard] Ow.

I'm going to spend most of today trying to figure out how to apologise. To everyone, except for Geoff, but I'll probably apologise to him again too ~~holy shit, I kissed him. where the HELL did that come from?~~. Cally probably won't ever forgive me, too.

[bangs head against the wall a bunch of times]

Yeah, but you're still depressed about things. Serves you right, Ms. 'Gremlin bite?! That sounds like fun!'

We'd better.

Okay, so my family was slaughtered when I was eleven...

...no, I don't want to talk about my family being slaughtered, I'm over that.

No, I don't think the insomnia, nightmares, flashbacks, general inability to trust anyone, and attraction to people incapable of returning my feelings has anything to do with my family's horrible demise.

Moving on. In the hopes of getting some closure, I dedicated my entire life to killing Xena in revenge. But since being here I've found myself caring for people, taking part in altruistic acts, making out with vampires, doing deeds which may be called "Heroic"...

No, I don't find this is a sign of healing. I find it highly disconcerting and going against my natural inclinations.

Yes, I am including the making out with vampires under going against my natural inclinations.

What did you just say?

CUTE?!?

I'll give you cute! Now where did I put that axe?

Hey! Where you going?

[OOC: Brilliant! Little Wooden Boy will hit this post tonight after work.]

My life is just ... falling apart around me. My parents are splitting up, my dad is apparently living with this completely obnoxious woman he works with, and I think my boyfriend may have killed one of my friends. He says that if he did it, he was under a fear toxin, but he doesn't have the best track record as far as truthfillness and good judgement go. Can I trust him?

And then I hate myself for thinking that.

If someone else killed this person ... I had two chances to warn her and passed them both up.

I want to go back to Pennsylvania.

Dear Little Wooden Boy,

So, I'm a sociopath and that works for me. I'm polite and kind of shy and apparently pretty and as a result some girls ~~and a few boys~~ seem to like me.

Unfortunately, people won't leave me alone. See, I had this experimant right? And I tested my fear toxin on a couple people and everyone is acting like I killed tham or something! I mean, it could have been worse, in the future I'm going to use mental patients put under my care by the State in my twisted fear experiments. These people are all fine and it only lasted a couple hours! It's not permanent like it will be some day.

And Martin Blank is like, after me or something. Maybe he thinks I'm cute? Apparently a lot of people do, but only girls like Paige want to go out with me. Do you think I'll get a reputation like hers? Do you think Sawyer's going to kick my ass when he finds out I'm totally boning his girlfriend? ~~but dude! who hasn't?~~ But yeah, Martin Blank is pulling my pigtails over this and it's making me very sad.

And all that 'blaming the fear toxin' stuff? Lame. I mean, is it my fault that unlike everyone else while under the effects of the fear toxin, he became homicidally violent? I think that says something about him, rather than something about me. I have no idea why my fucked upness is worthy of recrimination and investigation but Blank's is simply glossed over.

Is it the black? Should I wear more black? Or is it the hot redheaded girlfriend? I don't think I could talk Lily into giving up Draco for me but if it would help...

Love,
Jonathan

((umm, much love to Blank-mun and everyone else involved in the plot against Jonathan, this isn't me attacking or anything. Oh Also much love to Paige-mun, who puts up with me leaving for lab in the middle of NWS scenes. This is not me attacking you either!))

Dear Little Wooden Boy (while I'm here anyway)

I know deep down my new boyfriend is a total jackass, but he's always so nice to me ~~and good in bed~~ I don't seem to be able to care. Also I'm totally lusting after a really shy guy who I really want to tie up and whip while wearing a tiny PVC dressn but I'm worried it'll scare him off. What should I do?

Oh yeah and I'm destined to like save the world from ultimate evil with my sisters and stuff which is a bit of a worry to be honest and also making live a little widely before I get murdered

Paige

Dear Little Wooden Boy,

Life is great, other than massive outside forces trying to make me emo.

Make them stop.

Ktnhxbai.

Dear Little Wooden Boy:

I don't like you. You're not a real dolly at all, and Miss Edith is much prettier than you. But you listen better than she does, because she's just made of porcelain.

Would you like a cup of tea? All the stars in the sky are singing out the right name, but nobody can hear it but I--and I'm not telling.

Drusilla

Dear Little Wooden Boy,

I'm beginning to wonder if I'm going insane. I keep losing moments of my day. Time moves strangely for me--though it's gotten better. I took out a bunch of books from the library, and didn't remember it.

There's an entire weekend missing, too. Everyone talks about the zombies, but I don't remember. Any of it.

It's very frustrating.

Also, Helo isn't here, and the Chief left ages ago, and I feel rather alone. And Willow is hardly around to talk to.

Sigh.

feeling emo,
Sharon, who is not a Cylon. Really.

Dear Little Wooden Boy,

Krycek is a big fat meanie. He keeps threatening my life for things like gifts (http://www.livejournal.com/community/fandomhighdorms/238159.html) and mysteriously appearing cupcakes (http://www.livejournal.com/community/fandomhigh/313204.html?thread=15316852#t15316852) and more gifts (http://www.livejournal.com/users/krycek_rat/10943.html)!

He can't prove a damn thing!

.. and I fear what he'll do when he hears the radio tonight.. cuz he'll blame me for that and I deny all responsibility!
-Duce

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