Four

[cameronmitchell.livejournal.com]

Four days. Four. Freaking. Days.

My player keeps wondering why I'm being this angsty (as if I don't have reason enough). It's really easy; I haven't gotten laid for FOUR FRAKKING FRELLING FUCKING DAYS.

I'm a teenager, damnit. Sex is always on my mind. My girlfriend isn't even on the same planet and spanking the monkey isn't quite cutting it now that I've been with Vala Mal Doran.

What? This is therapy. Can't I for once not be a boyscout and just come right out and admit that I haven't have sex in four days and it's FRUSTRATING.

Comments

[mycanonhatesme]

Oh, you poor thing. Let me play my violin for you. *rolls eyes* It's been a lot longer than four days for some of us, and we manage to survive.

[cameronmitchell.livejournal.com]

You're a girl! It's not the same... She did this on purpose. Got me hooked on daily sex and then ran off.

[whitedeathpod.livejournal.com]

If Chloe hits you for that, I'm laughing.

[cameronmitchell.livejournal.com]

She didn't. Nerh!

[mycanonhatesme]

I'd be happy to hit him if that would amuse you. Honestly, "you're a girl it's not the same." Right, because girls totally don't like sex too.

[notstakedyet.livejournal.com]

This is what happens when you date non-Europeans. They think girls don't like it, and also look at you in adorable befuddlement when you mention things like making use of the g-spot.

[mycanonhatesme]

Oh Angelus, I knew you'd be a voice of reason here.

[mycanonhatesme]

Oh yes, that's exactly what she did. I bet she's off wherever cackling to herself about how much you're pining for her while she's away.

But hey, just think of how fantastic the sex will be when she gets back.

[cameronmitchell.livejournal.com]

I bet, she knows she's got me wrapped around her little finger.

*sighs* See, my need for sex is going to override my need for shouting at her.

[mycanonhatesme]

Does she know you well enough to know how your needs will override each other? Because if so, she may have planned it that way. There's no need for shouting when you could get sex instead.

[cameronmitchell.livejournal.com]

Shit. I wouldn't be surprised. I'm so screwed.

[fates_jaye]

We only let you think it's different for a girl.

[cameronmitchell.livejournal.com]

Really? So you think about sex every 3 seconds too?

[whitedeathpod.livejournal.com]

Not with you, they don't!

[cameronmitchell.livejournal.com]

You're digging a hole for yourself here, Stump Chunkman.

[fates_jaye]

Depends on how long it's been and who's around. Whether or not they're cute...

Every 3 seconds? I thought it was every 12. See, you're just special.

[cameronmitchell.livejournal.com]

It was 12 and then Vala left. And then it became 9, then 6 and now it's down to 3. I'm really not looking forward to tomorrow.

[daddylexbucks.livejournal.com]

See Chloe, this is why you should have taken advantage of my visit to Fandom Town. Seeing as we'd be far away from anything approaching the authorities, I'd have been much more likely to indulge in my secret desire to have sex with you on a pool table.

Or watch you drink a bottle of Ty-Nant


((reading back posts and couldn't resist))

[cameronmitchell.livejournal.com]

[daddylexbucks.livejournal.com]

((melts from the hotness!!))

[cameronmitchell.livejournal.com]

((ZOMG! Yes! The only reason I sometimes actually watch Smallville is because of Chloe and Lex.))

[mycanonhatesme]

Secret desire to...wait, you've thought about having sex with me and never said anything? Lex, did it ever occur to you to maybe make this not so secret?! Like, sooner? As in, when you were here? I would have gladly indulged in your fantasy, as long as you were the one drinking the Ty-Nant afterwards. Because that's hot.

(Hee! Thanks for breaking Chloe's brain like that. Mmmmm. *g*)

[cameronmitchell.livejournal.com]

[daddylexbucks.livejournal.com]

Well, there were the authorities to think about and the fact that your sixteen, which sure, doesn't seem like it's likely to stop me but you'd be surprised how quickly a farm town would be able to rustle up a few torches and pitchforks once some one in the Sheriff's office cried statutory rape.

So, does this mean we're on for whenever our paths next meet? Because I'd be very interested to move on from mereky eye-fucking you to acutally fucking you.

And how about a compromise? I'll drink the Ty-Nant off of you. Sounds fair yes?

[mycanonhatesme]

Oh Lex, I think it's very safe to say that we're on for the next time we meet. Especially since I just celebrated my birthday, and am now legal, even according to the backwards laws of Kansas.

And I love that Ty-Nant idea. Especially if it's been chilled. That sounds very, very fair.