I am so oppressed

[http://users.livejournal.com/_wespryce/]

Dear Doctor,

I have emo daddy issues. Big-time.

However, so does everybody else in Fandom High. This means that my emo daddy issues are not getting their fair share of attention.

MY PARENTAL RELATIONSHIP IS WAY MORE F*CKED UP THAN YOURS! BOW BEFORE MY MISERY!

er... is my hour up yet?

Comments

[notstakedyet.livejournal.com]

Hey, I loved my dad.

He tasted just like chicken.

[dr-jwilsonmd.livejournal.com]

*Thunk*

Dayum...my brain found a whole new level of the gutter for that one.

[notstakedyet.livejournal.com]

Now, now, let's not be sick.

My sister on the other hand...

[http://users.livejournal.com/_wespryce/]

Vampire family life appears to be one big incestuous orgy in any case.

Which means you probably did the Master, which is way creepier than anything you got up to with Darla, Dru, and/or Spike.

[dr-jwilsonmd.livejournal.com]

You know...and I just managed to find another layer of 'totally' wrong down here. Would you call that your OT3, multi-tasking or maintaining balanced familial relations?

[notstakedyet.livejournal.com]

Hey, hey, hey! Let's not be gross here. I couldn't stand being underground with that guy for five seconds. Besides, considering what his face looked like I don't even wanna imagine what's going on beneath the belt.

I get through the night by pretending Darla never schtupped him either, even though the likelihood of that being true is right up there with unicons

[notstakedyet.livejournal.com]

I'm a go-getter. I like to think I can do it all. Sometimes I do it all while naked. And wet. In a shower. Not that you'd care.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_wespryce/]

Yup, he totally lost his virginity with Buffy.

Under the couch.

[notstakedyet.livejournal.com]

Don't tempt me to get started on the bad and boring sexual partners stories. Buffy alone could fill volumes. Or a post-it since "Yawn" covers oh so much

[mycanonhatesme]

My mother's in a mental institution. My misery beats yours I think, omg my Wesley knowledge sucks.

[dr-jwilsonmd.livejournal.com]

It's good to set goals for yourself. Of course I don't care, I was certainly not spending some time, wet in a shower imagining how much water we'd conserve in a shower together.

[notstakedyet.livejournal.com]

I like to have things to aspire to. Like showering

[swerval_zero]

My brother ran away to work in marketing.

[dr-jwilsonmd.livejournal.com]

You challenge yourself, that's a noble sentiment. Or just standing pinned to the shower stall wall with your wrists held above your head.

[valentine-tart.livejournal.com]

My dad's a great guy. He hooked me up with my Uncle.

...who wants me to hook.

[lovelylana.livejournal.com]

My parents were both killed in front of me during a freak meteor shower when I was a little girl. Such emo!

[notstakedyet.livejournal.com]

It's how I rise to the occasion. When do we skip to the part where I can use toys on you?

[auroryborealis.livejournal.com]

...my daddy is absent? And a jerk who tries to wreck my mommy's marriage and stuff?

[pure-blooddraco.livejournal.com]

My Dad is in prison for trying to murder a bunch of 15 year old kids. And he's mean, overbearing and is never pleased with what I do.

[12parseckessel.livejournal.com]

Least you got a Daddy. Mine was a who-knows-what from who-knows-where. off-world spacer most likely.

I have no parental issues. Ma's dead.

but I do have a thing for pretty guys in tweed who are having issues

[http://users.livejournal.com/_wespryce/]

And he's mean, overbearing and is never pleased with what I do.

Dude! That's my Dad, too! Do you think we're brothers?

[janet_fraiser]

With really different hair.

[dr-jwilsonmd.livejournal.com]

No wonder you're a role model to the JAs. We do keep having this discussion about pretty mouths yapping instead of...insert your lewd object of choice here.

[janet_fraiser]

*ignores your daddy issues and dangles library card*

*starts humming the tune for 'The Creation of Man' from The Scarlet Pimpernel*

*demands that you costume for it*

[http://users.livejournal.com/_wespryce/]

Did we ever actually see Wes's dad? I don't think so. Oh, wait. Wes shot him once.

::relinquishes all dreams of hot Dad!hair::