(no subject)

[http://users.livejournal.com/_original_emo/]

Is my son a failure?

Case in point, this is a typical day for Lee Gideon Adama:

-Wakes up
-Takes a two hour shower using soap for soft skin and three different shampoos and conditioners.
-Eats toast.
-Styles hair with seven different haircare products.
-Eats toast.
-Admires his biceps and professes his love for said biceps.
-Eats toast.
-Writes poetry about his *gag* feelings.
-Eats English muffins.
-Buys butter.
-Flirts with John Crichton. Does this mean he's gay? I can't tell.
-Let's my sekkrit girlfriend Kara Thrace have her way with him.
-Eats toast with butter and jam.
-Goes to sleep with a teddy bear.

WHERE DID I GO WRONG?

Comments

[http://users.livejournal.com/_original_emo/]

I do not send mine back. Her love scarred me and sent me into therapy.

Grow a thicker skin, woman!

INTOXICATE ME NOW

[leeadama.livejournal.com]

YES, CEDRIC IS MY BOYFRIEND.

IT'S NICE.

Re: ARGH DAD!!

[leeadama.livejournal.com]

...omg, I will send you a letter of my IMPORTANT DEALINGS LIKE HOW I'M WORKING FOR THE DEAN OF THE SCHOOL!

I'm sleeping with a beautiful woman, not a teddy bear. Nothing's wrong with me.


....*hates*

[leeadama.livejournal.com]

*CLINGS TO JOHN SO VERY VERY TIGHTLY*

[leeadama.livejournal.com]

*whispers, "JOHN! SSSHHH!!!"*

[leeadama.livejournal.com]

I JUST DON'T UNDERSTAND THIS! Zak is a BOHEMIAN PAINTER.

[twanky-twiddle.livejournal.com]

You shall be mine William Adama!

And stop making my delightful young sponsee cry, you wicked brute

[sensethevisions]

*loves Widow Twanky*

Re: ARGH DAD!!

[sensethevisions]

*offers to follow you around and take pictures for you to send to your big meanie of a dad*

[whitedeathpod.livejournal.com]

*CLINGS BACK AND PROTECTS FROM EVIL MEAN DADDYS AND PATS LEE'S NOT WEE BICEPS*

[sensethevisions]

Zak obviously does not have the intelligence and strength of Lee.

[whitedeathpod.livejournal.com]

*whispers* "BUT IT'S SO CUTE!"

[leeadama.livejournal.com]

*TRIES NOT TO CRY*

[psycho-barbie.livejournal.com]

Now look what you've done!

Not my fault you produce emo in all who meet you!

[http://users.livejournal.com/_original_emo/]

Miss Twanky, have you met my son, Lee? He is far better looking than I and I have no doubt you could provide him with the proper education he needs.

You were not there to hold her during her pain!

[leeadama.livejournal.com]

*MAKES FRANTIC KILLING GESTURES*

Re: ARGH DAD!!

[http://users.livejournal.com/_original_emo/]

My son should be filling out his War College applications, not having his picture taken!

[leeadama.livejournal.com]

AND KARA THRACE HASN'T HAD HER WAY WITH ME IN DAYS, THAT FLOOZY.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_original_emo/]

No, Zak is far better and HE LISTENS TO HIS FATHER.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_original_emo/]

If you really must be with Kara, I demand that you marry her immediately and continue the Adama bloodline!

[leeadama.livejournal.com]

I ALREADY HAVE THE RING PICKED OUT.

[twanky-twiddle.livejournal.com]

From what I hear, your son does not need any education in how to be a proper gentleman. You, however, need to be taken firmly in hand.

I have no doubt you made her cry, merely so you could hold her. You lecherous fiend!

[whitedeathpod.livejournal.com]

*GIVES YOU A HANKY WITH MY MONOGRAMMED INITIALS AND SINGS YOU LULLABYES*

[whitedeathpod.livejournal.com]

*whispers* "BUT IT'S SHAPED LIKE A..."

[leeadama.livejournal.com]

OMG, OT, from Desert Places this morning:

"Give what you have to Ali," al-Adama said. "He needs to keep his strength, as he is more like his mother than myself. Zak took more after me. Remember our Zak, my wife? How he could ride for days with half a skein full and come back as fresh as when he left. I never saw a warrior like him, before or since."


OMG EVEN IN FIC YOU'RE RIDING MY ASS OVER THIS.