Oh noes!

[oatmanspatient.livejournal.com]

My pillow and have separated! Our relationship has fallen apart. We fight everyday about when I should fall asleep! I don't know how to recocile with it!

Oh noes! I've just been served papers! My pillow has taken ownership of my bed!

WAAAAH! I NEED THERAPY!!!

Comments

[cameronmitchell.livejournal.com]

No! Not the pillow! You got to fight this thing, nothing can come between a man and his pillows, damnit!

[oatmanspatient.livejournal.com]

I don't know what to do! It says I only come to it late at night and never spend any time with it! I have no idea how our relationship can be saved!

[cameronmitchell.livejournal.com]

Okay, first of all, you got to make sure you treat it right. Don't use it in pillow fights, because then it will feel used and abused. Not a good thing.

Do you hug it enough in the morning? Pillows like to get snuggled. Also, if you're in your room doing other stuff, take it with you. Use it when you're watching telly, when you're doing homework behind your desk. You got to make it feel needed, man.

[oatmanspatient.livejournal.com]

I snuggle with it every night, but it says I'm not giving it the time it needs. It says I'm too busy, but who puts a roof over it's head? Hmm? Who gives it a good washing when I've drooled on it too much? And it says I take it for granted?!!

All it does is lie there and do nothing.

I think... I think the magic has gone out of our relationship.

[ten-and-chips.livejournal.com]

[blinks a few times, uncertain whether he's awake too early or this isn't making sense] I think you need to show that pillow who's boss.

[cameronmitchell.livejournal.com]

Dude, that's just going to lead to a nast divorce.

[ten-and-chips.livejournal.com]

I didn't mean ABUSE, Mr Mitchell. In this scenario, the relationship is not equal, because the pillow isn--shouldn't be sentient.


Yo.

[oatmanspatient.livejournal.com]

I eventually go to sleep on top of it every night. It's only for a few hours and... and... there's some drooling involved.

Does that count?

[ten-and-chips.livejournal.com]

Er...aye, that might do it. [does not like the thought of Marty drooling]

[bugofjustice.livejournal.com]

So you're in the middle of a pillow fight? Such a shame!

[oatmanspatient.livejournal.com]

But without the women in kinky underwear! It's not even fun!

[bugofjustice.livejournal.com]

Maybe the pillow would like some kinky underwear.

[psycho-barbie.livejournal.com]

At least you have a pillow.

My not-a-pillow got itself accused of ripping up another pillow and made a break for it, leaving me without neck support.

[oatmanspatient.livejournal.com]

Now that's a pillow fight!

[psycho-barbie.livejournal.com]

But there were no girls in skimpy underwear...

[janet_fraiser]

I'd have more sympathy if you didn't think I was an inbred mutant freak with weird toes. As it is, suck it up and deal.

[oatmanspatient.livejournal.com]

Well I just think your inbred now. I've seen your toes and they look normal.

I do think your feet are unusally small though. Puny even. Are those Baby shoes you are wearing?

[janet_fraiser]

Yes, I have normal toes. At least you admit that much, though did you have to participate in the destruction of my favorite slippers to get that far?

And no, I am not inbred. See, this is why I didn't want to admit to being Jack's cousin. It's like people assume the worst about you just because you're related to him.

My feet are perfectly normally sized for a woman of my size! It'd be different if I were six feet tall and had feet this size.

I am going to mock your pillow pain forever, Marty. God, you can't even fluff a pillow properly?

[chasingangela]

My theory? It feels abused. Single bed, two people, one pillow. You ignore it for hours and days, and then you expect it to put up with *that*? It has its pillow-dignity, after all.

This is why one of us needs to move off-campus next semester. We can get a bigger bed and give it all kinds of pillow friends to frolic with then.

[oatmanspatient.livejournal.com]

CJ has offered me a room in the Tardis, you know.

Maybe then the pillow could be happy. Running free with the other pillows. It'll be a Free Range Pillow.

Only catch is that any the Doctor and CJ have to be involved in any um... delicate moments.

[chasingangela]

Um ... you know, Logan Echolls has a lot of empty rooms. I'm told many of them have room for many pillows.

Do you really want to have C.J. and Ten around when you're being close to your ... pillow?

[master-of-fear.livejournal.com]

I think your pillow's showing good taste! *sticks tongue out at you*

[oatmanspatient.livejournal.com]

*grabs tongue*

[master-of-fear.livejournal.com]

*secretly knew this was all about Blank wanting some tangue action from him*

[http://users.livejournal.com/___lily_evans_/]

You're just lucky that I'm not Hermione because then I would start an organization for the promotion of pillow rights and force people to purchase/wear buttons for the cause.